I have been thinking a lot on the topic of happiness lately. There is so much around us, especially as women, that tells us we can't be happy without someone or something to make us so. This totally irks me, because this type of thinking is the seed that sprouts co-dependency and a loss of self. In case you haven't heard it yet today...you do not need anyone or anything to make you happy. In my opinion, there is no one or nothing that can make you happy. I believe you have to find that state of mind yourself through self-discovery, alone time, reflection, and truly getting to know yourself and those things you enjoy. Now don't get me wrong. I definitely do not mean that people and things can't bring you joy, because they totally do. I've been married to an awesome man now for almost three years, and that relationship has brought me so much joy. But I do not depend on him to be my sole source of happiness, and he does not expect me to be that for him. We support each other, and we laugh together, but we are not dependent on one another. The same goes for material things as well. Attaching ourselves to something and relying on it for happiness is a sure way to get the opposite.
This doesn't just apply to those positive relationships, either. It could be those people or things in your life that bother you or bring you down. If you spend too much time worrying or thinking about these aspects of your life, you will quickly rob yourself of any joy and happiness by your own doing. I am still working on this in my own life. I often find my thoughts drifting to what the thoughts of others could be. This, in turn, causes some pretty serious social awkwardness, which, yes, can be funny, but it also destructive. I find when I am my authentic self, that awkwardness and anxiety totally vanish, and in these moments, I am truly happy. This is an important aspect of happiness to remember. You are in control of this, and you are who you are. That person is worthy of acceptance...most importantly from yourself.
This new way of thinking helps us to realize that we are responsible for how we perceive the world around us. If we acknowledge this, we can create happiness every day in our lives. We can't expect those around us to provide us with happiness. We must create it for ourselves by accepting who we are, what we are, and where we are going.
How do you cultivate happiness in your life?